Destiny Shaping Question #5 – Have I mistaken busyness for fruitfulness?

Busy – I have grown to dislike that word. 

I have just gone through the busiest year of my life and at times felt like I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown.  I’ve always been known as a hard worker.  One recognized for taking responsibility and making things happen.  I’ve considered it the evidence of employer approval and appreciation to be entrusted with new responsibilities.  So I keep adding more onto the already overflowing pile of things to do.  To say no would be an admission of weakness.  As a result I am forced, by my own pride, to work to the point of exhaustion.

I thought my busyness was an honorable thing.  I was sacrificing myself nobly for my employer and clients.  But my life was the most unfruitful it had been since becoming a believer.

This summer I took a week off for vacation and spent the time in quiet and stillness, prayerfully seeking some guidance from God for my now desperately miserable situation.  As I sat before Him, He exposed my heart.  The drive for success and affirmation in the workplace had replaced Him as being what was supremely valuable.  My loyalty was misplaced and my priorities were wrong. And as a result I was utterly fruitless.  It was a crushing realization.  And one that has required change.

In John chapter 15 Jesus talks about fruitfulness.  What is interesting is that He doesn’t mention fruitfulness in connection with work, but in connection with abiding.  Abiding?  That sounds too easy.  But just as God has ordained that our salvation is completely His work, so is our fruitfulness.

No glory for me to achieve by my diligent efforts.  No recognition of my hard work.  Just waiting and yielding and abiding.

I think I could get used to that.

CONCLUSION:  Time to slow down and rest in God.

2 thoughts on “Destiny Shaping Question #5 – Have I mistaken busyness for fruitfulness?

  1. Alyssa August 25, 2008 / 11:51 pm

    Eirene,

    Your sensitivity to the Holy Spirit and the humility with which you carry your heart before the Lord is so encouraging to me. I really enjoy reading about your journey in God.

  2. Meshaay August 27, 2008 / 12:47 am

    I can relate this. For me, it was impressing everyone at school in my sport and academics. That had seriously bad long term effects, but by God’s mercy, I’m coming out.

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